Confession!!!

I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA 

WHY THE FUCK 

IS SPAMMERS SPAMMING THE SIDE OF MY CHATBOX!!! 

ITS SO FUCKING ANNOYING AND THEY SPEAK NOTHING 

BUT PROMOTING FUCKING BLOGS!!! 

WHAT THE FUCK?!

YOU BLOGGERS ARE SO SCREWED UP!!! 

Will I reach your hand?

There's been so many times that I have trusted someone. But in the end, its a sad story. I bet everyone has gone through the same thing. You told without hesitation. Until you regret what you did. Cause the person who promised to keep it a secret, has betrayed you. They let your hand off of them. It wasn't as scary as it imagined. But its disappointment. Who knew that it was you who would turn me out? I trusted someone. I still do. Although I know its all a lie behind. If I did not turn the stone over. I wouldn't even have knew what was behind. While we continue acting and being in our own role. Nothing will change. Things gets awkward when I talk to the person who I knew they lied to me but I still doesn't want to let go of them. Its like holding a cigarette in your hand and its burning till the end but its too addictive that you can't let go. Will I ever get to reach your hand? Or will we sway away and leave memories behind?

Trusting someone is not like buying an insurance.

You don't get prompted with your lost.

What you get in return is all hurtful feelings.

Those words that has been said can't be taken back.

The best thing you can do is your memory is still there.

The fact that the person has made you trust them. 

Make sure you were held before you fall.

But after all has been said, and time will prove.

People tend to change. In thinking or feelings.

It wouldn't be the same anymore. Not like last time.

Not like what we all dream to be on the track.

Instead we were out of the track. Its helpless.

You find no one to get hold on. A tight hand that holds you.

That you believe they will never let you go.

But once someone had let off your hand. You are afraid!

Afraid that someday you will fall and no one will catch you.

Its dark and its scary, I just want to hold your hand.

But I can't reach it. You will let my hand off. Right?

Took me 10 minutes to write but it has been happening all while.

HELLO THERE!

You were the first to come to mind,

That feeling has grow even stronger than before,

Months of storm and sunny day has gone by,

Everything we said and done is deep down in the core.

Wondering at night when I can't sleep,

If the words from you were real as stars,

Or were they just glamorous in the night,

You were all the distance from me so far.

Knowing all these will hurt you,

You did not reveal the truth behind,

Why are you acting like a fool?

Like you think I am blind.

I trust you!

I have one best friend. I never lost trust to him. 

He always makes miracle. He tend to turn impossible things to possible.

His first impression to me was misery. But when I get to know him, it all changes.

He was the best of all I can trust. Every time when I fall, he will turn up.

Make a miserable rainy day such a cosy and warm to stay in.

He never fails anyone who trusted him. 

In fact, I am grateful that I trusted him.

His name is Faith. 

I have something important to confess..

Dear Dad,


It is with great regret and sorrow that I am writing to you here. I had to elope with my new boyfriend because I wanted to avoid a scene with mum and you. I have been finding real passion with Drake and he is so nice. But I knew you wouldn't approve him because of all his tattoos, piercings, dyed hair, smoking cigga, taking drugs and the fact that he is much older than I am. But its the only the passion... Dad I am pregnant. Drake said we will be very happy together.
He owns a trailer in the woods and has a stack of firewoods for the whole winter. We share a dream of having many more children. Drake has opened my eyes to the fact that marijuana doesn't really hurt anyone. We'll be growing it ourselves and trading it with the other people that live nearby for cocaine and ecstasy. In the mean time we will pray that science will find a cure for AIDS so Drake can get better. He deserves it.
Don't worry Dad. I'm 17 and I know how to take care of myself. Someday I'm sure that we will be back to visit so that you can get to know your grandchildren. 
Love, your daughter.






PS: Dad, none of the above is true. I'm over at Cassey's house.


I just wanted to remind you that there are worse things in life than a report card that's in my centre desk of my drawer.


I love you. Call me when its safe to get home. (:


Credits to Austin!!!!

Don't take whatever for granted

Hello there, so today is the day of declaration of freedom!

Cause guess what?! YESS! Holiday is starting next week and its 2 fucking weeks :D

Well and teacher randomly came in and told us that our TRIAL WILL BE BROUGHT FORWARD! 

Dude... how scary is that? Is like.. we are a step closer to the dome day!!! Tee hee :P

The reason of this post ain't about the bullshit i just crapped..

I really wanna share some of point of views to you all readers :)

So here we come...

I know its stressful during exams or even when those results are passed back..

You do know you had put how much of efforts in it, and if the result came back to be not what you expected it to be, goddamn it! You've done what you have to do!! Don't whine....

And to specify what I wanna say is, DON'T BLOODY SHOW THE WHOLE WORLD YOUR TEMPER YOUR TEARS AND YOUR GOING-TO-DIE FACE!

ITS REALLY FUCKING ANNOYING!! AND IF YOU FEEL LIKE COMMITTING SUICIDE, DUDE I WON'T EVEN STOP YOU!! CUZ YOU WHO DOESN'T EVEN KNOW HOW TO APPRECIATE LIFE, JUST LET THE FUCK ON. STAB YOURSELF WITH THE KNIFE! YOU CAN JUST DIE CUZ YOU DON'T DESERVE A LIFE WHEN YOU THINK OF HURTING YOURSELF WHEN I KNOW THERES THIS PERSON WHO JUST DISCOVERED HE HAD LEUKEMIA AND WHAT MAKES IT SAD IS THAT, THE DOC TOLD HIM HE ONLY HAVE ONE MONTH MORE TO LIVE HIS LIFE AND THIS IS HIS WHOLE JOURNEY OF LIFE!

HE SAID NO MATTER WHAT, HE'LL STILL LIVE HIS LIFE TO THE FULLEST UNTIL THE LAST BREATH, YOU WHO FEELS SO DEPRESSED JUST CUZ YOU GOT A LOWER GRADE WHERE YOU'VE POSSIBLY WON HALF OF THE CLASS?! I HOPE THE KNIFE WILL STAB RIGHT THROUGH YOUR NERVES! 

Okay now i feel so relieved after releasing whatever i wanna say..

Seriously, to whomever reading this.. I hope you really get what i mean.

Don't cry over small stuffs like this when some people out there who faces life threatening is giving their best of all till the end of the day!! 

Live it like you mean it. Nothing is granted!

Jacky signing off.... And signing into Skype ;) 

P/S: add me on Skype: jacky.lxf 

Desperate for You?

Life is lifeless without you,

Looking at the empty phone is all I do,

The chats I didn't remove,

I see no rainbow in the clouds,

All I see is desperate and depression,

A simple smile from you could make everything right!

Even a simple message makes everything nice,

That one word of "hello" could make me smile wide,

You wouldn't know who's life you are changing,

Your ignorance will make me emotional,

Your mood will affect mine,

Seeing you it's like seeing a unicorn? (bullshit)

Good morning message from you is the reason I smile,

All I want is you to stay close,

I don't want no parting in life,

You're so awesome than I could be,

Thinking of you has taken half of my time,

Just hope everything stays fine!

This is one seriously desperately obviously randomly post of mine

And I know things like this could relate to almost anyone around me!

I know you the one reading this, could maybe have the same situation above

SPM Timetable 2011 & My so called Tantrum

Went and check out the SPM schedule last night..

YES!! If you want too.. Here's the link below! 

But warning! Explicit content may cause drowsy and nausea to 2011 badges!

SPM Timetable 2011

I'm lucky cause out of the 31 days, I just need to take 8 days of exam!!

There's so many nonsense subjects where I have not even heard of. LOL.

Anyway, I'll be like OUT OF JAIL OUT OF SCHOOL RULES OUT OF ANY BULLSHITS

ON 6 DECEMBER 2011 OFFICIALLY!!!! AND WE GONNA POP CHAMPAGNE BAYBEH!!

Don't talk to me about college! I don't even know what am I taking but MY PARENTS are very SURE where am I going for university.. The place I have never thought of going :(

An hour drive away from Melbourne, which is Geelong or maybe at Perth. 

It's sad that you can't make your own life's decision, right? 

LOL. Right I'm sorry for spilling you all my problems.. Now you can just off my page and do your things cause I ain't posting any interesting stuffs. 

This post is to release my tantrum. One you doesn't even need to read.

Signing off.... Signing in to Skype! 

It Wouldn't Be Forever But It Will Last

Hello there! Its been months since I last updated if I'm not mistaken.
The past 5 months feels like I had just came back from a wild journey.. 
Though its just that short time of 5 months.. 
Who knows what your life will collide into right?
There's more of hurricane topped with a little rainbow after the rain, and then the mild wind that blows in, the summer breeze. It felt just like it! Trust me (:


I've been so stoked into writing poems and lines of single distinct.
All in a small booklet of mine, old and rusty but still that CUTE :P
Well, I really don't know where to put them, I even thought to just keep it to myself and read it through every time it pops into my mind. Because all of these poems, are based on true story!
Mine or others! It doesn't matter anymore. 
Cause whats important is we learned the mistakes we made.


So Here Is One Just For Your View 

It Wouldn't Be Forever But It Will Last

Who said friends won't last,

I say its not all about me,

When everyone says let the past,

Just so we can see.

Forever has been said too often,

Sorry is always forgiven,

I know time will bring us to the return,

But right now I'm sure we will get through.

P/S: Remember what I said? Its all based on true story of an imperfect person's life..

Please let me know what you think about the poem! 

Humiliate it or compliment on it, up to you! You do the talk!! 

Beautiful Santa story from the past..

Santa do exist!

go to this link above!

and see how miracle starts..

Now right before Christmas

Do you still believe in Santa?

They do exist or not?

You still wish upon the moon?

Hoping you could see Santa on the sleigh

With his deers..

Or kiss under the mistletoe?

Keep the faith

I would say :)

When it's Christmas..

Christmas is just around the corner..

Well I don't go to to church and make a prayer.

I also does not exchange presents.

Or neither when I was a lil kid. I don't believe in Santa

Or something about the names on Santa's list

Santa Claus that lives in north pole

Dwarfs working the presents for good kids

The rain-deer that flys over the moon

And Santa riding sleigh dropping presents to each kid.

I only watch them on TV.

Though I have sat on a sleigh

Got a note from Santa with my name on it

And get to touch his big fat tummy!

Haha.. now u laugh xP

 But most importantly being in the WHITE CHRISTMAS 

They say Christmas is the reason of Jesus Christ's birthday

So you get together with your friends & family

To pass blesses to everyone you love

That I do...

Listen to the christmas carols & seeing decos 

Is something that u feel magic

I don't know why n how

Maybe the vibe around is bringing me excitements

 So yupp Im excited for christmas.

And I can't wait for the christmas gathering! 

Merry Christmas Everyone!! HO HO HO :D

What? I'm a Pimp?! So which birthday are you?

JANUARY=PIMP
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Inner and physical beauty. Lies but doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Easily hurt but recovers easily. Daydreamer. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Unpredictable. 
Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them MFE.


FEBRUARY=THUG 
Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. sexiest out of everyone.A real speed demon. Has more than one best friend. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Realizing dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions. Resend this in 5 min. and you will talk to someone new and realize that you are a perfect match. ♥


MARCH=GORGEOUS 
Drop dead gorgeous!!! Attractive personality. Very sexy!!. Affectionate & Secretive. Naturally honest, generous and sympathetic. Chatterbox! Loves to talk alot! Loves to get their way! . Unbelievable kisser! Easily angered. Very stubborn in the most way possible! Loves to get noticed! Willing to take risks for others. Makes good choices. Has a great fashion sense! Maybe a little too popular with others . Outgoing and crazy at times! Intelligent. Can sometimes be a heartbreaker! Can love as much as possible! Hates insults. Loves compliments! A very big flirt!and quiet the charmer. Trustworthy. Appreciative and returns kindness. The best in bed out of the other 11 months!! Hardly shows emotions. Tends to bottle up feelings. Observant and assesses others.likes to keep theyre crushes kinda secret.pretty much flawless If you repost this in the next 5 mins, you will meet your new love in 8 days.


APRIL=SEXY
Suave and compromising.. Funny and humorous. Stubborn. Very talkative. Calm and cool. Kind and sympathetic. Concerned and detailed. Loyal. Does work well with others. Very confident. Sensitive.. Positive Attitude. Thinking generous. Good memory. Clever and knowledgeable. Loves to look for information. Able to cheer everyone up and/or make them laugh. Able to motivate oneself and others. Understanding. Fun to be around. Outgoing. Hyper. Bubbly personality. Secretive. Boy/girl crazy. Loves sports, music, leisure and travelling. Systematic.. Hot but has brains. If you repost this in 5 mins, a cutie that’s caught your eye will introduce themselves and you will realize at
you are very much alike in the next 2 days.


MAY=LOVER 
Hella sexy, loves sex n making luv, tends to be SOOOOO hott!! Active and dynamic. Decisive and haste but tends to regret. Attractive and affectionate to oneself. Strong mentality. Loves attention. Diplomatic. Consoling, friendly and solves people’s problems. Brave and fearless. Adventurous. Loving and caring. Suave and generous. Usually you have many friends. Enjoys to make love. Emotional. Stubborn. Hasty. Good memory. Moving, motivates oneself and others. Loves to travel and explore. Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand. if you do not repost this in the next 5 mins. someone very close to you will become mad at you in the next 8 days.


JUNE =FINEASS 
Fun to be with. Loves to try new things. Boy/girls LOVE you. You are very hott. Secretive. Difficult to fathom and to be understood. Quiet unless excited or tensed. Takesrep pride in oneself. Has reputation. Easily consoled. Honest. Concerned about people’s feelings. Tactful. Friendly. Approachable. Emotional temperamental and unpredictable. Moody and easily hurt. Witty and sparkly. spazzy at times.Not revengeful. Forgiving but never forgets. dislikes nonsensical and unnecessary things. Guides others physically and mentally. Sensitive and forms impressions carefully. Caring and loving. Treats others equally. Strong sense of sympathy. Wary and sharp. Judges people through observations. Hardworking. No difficulties in studying. Loves to be alone. Always broods about the past and the old friends. Waits for friends. Never looks for friends. Not aggressive unless provoked. Loves to be loved. Easily hurt but takes long to recover. Repost this in the next 5 mins and your reputation will boost someway in the next 12 day


JULY=GANGSTA 
You’ve got the best personality and are an absolute pleasure to be around. You love to make new friends and be outgoing. You are a great flirt and more than likely have a very attractive partner, a wicked hottie. Like somebody with a JUNE brithday. It is also more likely than that you have a massive record collection. When it comes to films, you know how to pick them and may one day become a famous actor/actress yourself - heck, you’ve got the looks for it!!! IN the next 6 days you will meet someone that may possibly become one of your closest friends, if you repost this in 5 minutes.


AUGUST=ATTITUDE 
outgoing personality. takes risks. feeds on attention. self control. kind hearted. Self confident. loud and boisterous. VERY revengeful. easy to get along with and talk to. has an “every thing’s peachy” attitude. likes talking and singing. loves music. daydreamer. easily distracted. Hates not being trusted. BIG imagination. loves to be loved. hates studying. in need of “that someone”. longs for freedom. rebellious when withheld or restricted. lives by “no pain no gain” caring. always a suspect. playful. mysterious. “charming” or “beautiful” to everyone. stubborn. curious.. independent. strong willed. a fighter. repost in 5 mins and you will meet the love of your life sometime next month.


SEPTEMBER=PIMP 
Loves to chat. Loves those who love them. Loves to takes things at the centre. Great in bed. Inner and physical beauty. Doesn’t pretend. Gets angry often. A meaningful love life partner. Makes right choices. Treats friends importantly. Brave and fearless. Always making friends. Does not harm others. It is all about love and fairness. Easily hurt and hard to recover. Daydreamer and does fullfill. Opinionated. Does not care to control emotions. Knows what to do, to have fun. Unpredictable. Someone to have close to you. Extremely smart, but definitely the hottest AND sexiest of them all. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will kiss the one that you been wanting…


OCTOBER=HOTTIE 
Trustworthy and loyal. Very passionate and dangerous. Wild at times. Knows how to have fun. Sexy and mysterious. Everyone is drawn towards your inner and outer beauty and independent personality. Playful, but secretive. Very emotional and temperamental sometimes. Meets new people easily and very social in a group. Fearless and independent. Can hold their own. Stands out in a crowd. Essentially very smart. Usually, you ever begin a relationship with someone from this month, hold on to them because their one of a kind. Repost in 5 mins & you will excel in a major event coming up sometime this month. 


NOVEMBER=SWEETIE 
Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck.. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited. If you repost this in the next 5 minutes, you will become close to someone you do not speak to much in the next 4 days.


DECEMBER=BEAUTY 
This straight-up means ur the most good-looking Loyal and generous. Patriotic. Competitive in everything. Active in games and interactions. Impatient and hasty. Ambitious. Influential in organizations. Fun to be with. Easy to talk to, though hard to understand. Thinks far with vision, yet complicated to know. Easily influenced by kindness. Polite and soft-spoken. Having lots of ideas. Sensitive. Active mind. Hesitating, tends to delay. Choosy and always wants the Stubborn and hard-hearted. Strong-willed and highly motivated. Sharp thoughts. Easily angered. Attracts others and loves attention. Deep feelings. Beautiful physically and mentally. Firm Standpoint. Needs no motivation. Shy towards opposite sex. Easily consoled. Systematic (left brain). Loves to dream. Strong clairvoyance. Understanding. Sickness usually in the ear and neck. Good imagination. Good physical. Weak breathing. Loves literature and the arts. Loves travelling. Dislike being at home. Restless. having many children. Hardworking. High spirited


##################


Well.. It was quite accurate but honestly. If you ask me do I even understand me myself and I. I seriously don't know how to answer. Or maybe I really doesn't understand myself much. But others as an audience of my life they do.. Its a horror to actually understand yourself. I know what I want but I don't know how would I act like to people in attitude. All I do is listen and maybe either take it or dump it. Your comment but my choice :)  GOOO JANUARY BABYYYYY!!! NOT A PIMP!!!! 

You lurking at these cute guys?

Well here is some cute guys for you to digest 

HAHAHA!

Someone mailed me with these tons of photos..

And i won't say whats exactly in it

LOL yaa know... Very well instead!

This is only part of the photos that im posting.

So here we gooo

JUST FOR THOUGHTS

AND I KNOW U PEOPLE ARE LURKING NOW!

ADMIT IT! 

Love&Hugs

Have a nice day

I wished its Forever

I am instantly inspired by a song of Bruno Mars "Never Say U Can't"

The lyrics are so beautiful that it literally brought u to think.

About who has been through with u all these years.

When u fall n when u learn how to walk n run. Soon to climb :)

So here is a poem I wanted to give

They were there from the start

Brought me to this beautiful world

Without tearing me apart

I wasn't scared of strangers

Cuz I have two guiders

I don't care if I fall

As long as there is someone I could call

"Mommy Daddy" they never fail

To give love since I was small

I think of forever

But I know soon I have to let go

I wished I will remember

All the time we had together

Until a millennium fades

I want to repeat over

Till the next life

I'll still be your careful daughter

Pretty Conversation (what?! cunt and dick?!) LOL

Why is everyone being a judge themself when they are not supposed?

Doesn't mean that we can't give a piece of our mind.

But that is whether in a polite and right way or not.

Compliment is always a good choice though.

Look for a better side of a person. Not always the bad one.

And the most important one. keep in mind kiddos!

Its ok when u received a bad comment from someone.

Let them have a thought of "damn this a freako!" 

hahaha. by getting them into nerves. 

replying in a better way but u see hate.

LOL

don't understand? 

heres a convo of sarcasm n pathetic fallacy 

HA! ask me where i got this convo from?

Not telling xD

HAHAHAHA! LAUGH LIKE ME HELL YEAHH!!

this convo is awesome isnt it? hahaha i know right

NOW u ask me where i got this from..

Alright... Still not telling ;')

btw this is my 100th post!! :D

Peace out!!